Leadership and Business Skills · tool 4 of 11
Handling Conflict
Handling Conflict: chooses a response to conflict rather than reacting.
Best for: Any disagreement · Time: Minutes to hours
Domain: Across all domains · Focus area: Executing
How it works
The Thomas-Kilmann model gives five modes: competing, collaborating, compromising, avoiding and accommodating. None is always right. It depends on stakes, time and the relationship.
- Collaborate on important, shared problems.
- Compete when safety or ethics are at stake.
- Avoid only to cool things down.
How to apply it
- Separate the people from the problem.
- Have each side state the other’s view.
- Find the shared goal.
- Agree a next step in writing.
Two leads argue over a date. You ask each what they’re protecting: quality and a client promise. A staged release meets both.
Conflict about the work is healthy. Conflict about people is what you have to stop.
Use it
- Playbook: A stakeholder is blocking us
Quick check
When is competing appropriate?
Sources
- K. Thomas and R. Kilmann, Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument (1974)
Last reviewed 2026-11-02 against the PMBOK® Guide, 8th edition · Practitioner review pending · How this guide is made